Saturday, 6 October 2012

A day in the life of...

I had a hospital appointment this week.
It was just a consultation but following the consultation, I had to go for an MRSA swab test.
This involves a cotton bud up each nostril and to each side of the groin.
I will be having an operation (don't worry, it's a minor one) (I don't know why I'm using parentheses to calm readers concerns. I probably only know one of you personally and I'm sure the rest of you couldn't give a fuck. Rightly so) (Are there any rules on how many times parentheses can be used?) (Have you already lost the thread of this sentence? I know I would have. I'd have to go back and reread pre-parentheses.) (I'm just doing this to be annoying now!) but it's unlikely to take place within the next couple of months.
I'm no doctor but would've thought that the swab test would be a pointless exercise with such a large gap between test and operation.
As the nurse was leading me off to an examination room, the receptionist said to her, "Go on girl, go for it".
I didn't know if this statement was regarding a completely unrelated subject, or in reference to me but my uncertainty was set straight as soon as the door to the examination room was closed behind me, and the nurse said, "I said to Agnes (Name changed to protect the guilty by association) on reception, mmmmm Mr Daniels (Name changed to protect...) is very handsome"
For anybody who's not keeping up, I'm Mr Daniels (Name changed to protect...).
I would imagine that with gender reversal (No, I'm not having a sex change!), this would be exactly the kind of situation that could be intimidating for women.
I'm in a room with a woman who has admitted an attraction and is about to carry out a semi-intimate procedure.
To give her credit, she was going to do a groin swab and could very easily have convinced me that I'd need to be naked below the waist but she didn't.
To cut a long story short (and a bit of an anticlimax for anybody reading this) she was very professional. She was very talkative and it turns out that I know her cousin.
She accompanied me back in to reception and said loudly to the receptionist (and anybody else in earshot), "Mr Daniels was lovely!"
It was an unusual experience and in a strange way, very good for the ego.
I guess she was just an incredible flirt, who's not afraid to bring that part of her character into the workplace.
Who am I to judge?

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