Saturday, 18 August 2012

Flying Frigging Ants

Wrote this a few weeks back and just realised that I didn't publish it!
How could I deprive the World of this?!

When I was a kid, we used to get what we called, 'Flying Ant Day'.
I don't know if this is something that is experienced in other countries but it was basically one day every year when swarms of winged ants would take flight and aggravate the fuck out of everybody.
I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that these flying ants are around ten times the size of 'normal' ants.

The reason I bring this up is because today was at least, the second flying ant day of the year.
I can only assume that the changing weather has affected the amount of times that these creatures decide to show themselves.

These poxy ants really don't deserve wings because they don't seem to be able to use them properly. They dive bomb into you as if they can't fucking see you!

I had the pleasure of riding home from work, on my bike this evening.
Forty minutes of these wanky creatures banging off of my head had me cursing all the way.
It's an experience being forced to keep my mouth shut and stopping occasionally to remove ants from my eyes!

What is the deal with this day!?
The only positive thing that I remember about flying ant day was that they made quite an audible pop when you trod on them.

Oh well, we're all Gods creatures!


  1. Hahaha! Loved this.
    I remember those ants as kids and how we used to go around pouring boiling hot water all over them. And then they would get their revenge by burrowing themselves into your hair...bastards!

  2. They're so annoying!
    I'm sure humans would be the same if they were suddenly given wings. Can you imagine?!